So, according to my internet pal The Advice Goddess, the Pope gave a Good Friday speech that evokes some pretty powerful imagery! BEWARE the rise of Secularism, mah peeps, 'cause you may get stranded in the... DESERT OF GODLESSNESS!!! Oooooh, just like the Israelites in teh bible but 'cept without the manna!!! Or was it matzoh? 'Cause I'd just as soon eat sand. (HAhaha, ok, just kidding. Like many non-Jews, I ADORE matzoh with a passion and have been known to eat a whole box of the crackers myself, denying it to wailing infants beneath my feet like the baby-eating atheists of myth and legend... er, or something like that.)
What the Pope really means, of course, is that we should all BEWARE the RATIONAL THINKING, lest the DESERT OF GODLESSNESS subsume the ENTIRE WORLD, just like Kurt Vonnegut's ice-nine!!! Only DESERT!!!! ZOMG, HEAD FOR THE HILLS AND SAY TEH HAIL MARYS!!!!!!!! :D :D :D
Advice Goddess ALSO imagines something lovely... a DESSERT of godlessness! Now THERE'S a concept I can support!!!!
So, let's hear it! Your idea for the perfect DESSERT! OF! GODLESSNESS! Even if you're not an atheist yourself-- let your imagination run wild! After all, I've never been a Christian, but that didn't stop me from crafting an ELABORATE EASTER CARD, lovingly hand-drawn in Number Two Pencil with ALL THE BUNNIES I COULD CRAM INTO SIX SQUARE INCHES to give to my utter best friend in all the world, my bosom-sister... whom my mom informed me does not celebrate Easter. The stunned horror, the OUTRAGE, of my six-year-old self CANNOT be overstated. "But it's the CHOCOLATE BUNNY holiday!!! WHAT KIND OF SICK FREAKS DENY THEIR CHILD CHOCOLATE BUNNIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIES??????"
I very nearly started the Chocolate Bunnies For Jews movement. If only I'd had access to a printing press.
CLEARLY, my perfect Dessert Of Godlessness would involve frolicking chocolate animals. LOTS of them, all living together in peace and harmony and CELEBRATING the CHOCOLATEY GOODNESS of their chocolatey DNA!!! On a... SHEET of GREEN ICING, all piped up to look like grass. OOOH OOOH, and the frolicking chocolate animals would be arranged in clades according to phylogenetics!!! YEAH! And the lines representing the phylogenies would be, um, LICORICE laces! And all the cute little frolicking chocolate animals would include the transitional chocolate forms!!! NO, WAIT! That sheet of green icing is green icing over a SHEET CAKE, a LAYER CAKE with each layer being a geologic stratum, and baked into each layer are the CHOCOLATE FOSSILS of a given geologic era!!!!!!!!!!!! OH MY GOD I HAVE TO MAKE THIS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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Memorial Day redux
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My friend just made the most amazing dessert of matzoh EVER: matzoh with homemade caramel spread over the top, then baked in the oven until it hardened, then spread with melted chocolate. I tell you, it was so good it almost made me want to believe in a higher power, watching out for my taste buds. I may have had other desserts before, but I can't really remember.
Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhh, my taste buds are weeping with joy!!! Or is that drool? Either way, I think I have to make this. :)
Hmm. While that sounds good, there's more to being godless than evolution, you know. Where are the fornicating same-sex couples, abortionists, socialists, feminists, NEA supporters (doesn't matter if you take that to mean National Endowment for the Arts or National Education Association: the godly are opposed to art and education! It's a twofer!), sex education teachers, flag-burners, etc.?
I concede that it's hard to make a chocolate socialist. But still.
Mr. Subjunctive, you are absolutely right!!! I think there needs to be a WHOLE CHOCOLATE DIORAMA, perhaps on a tier above, based on godless human social movements!
Chocolate socialists are, indeed, tough. All I can think of is how to make a chocolate anarchist-- we could have him holding a tsarist-era chocolate bombe and perhaps a beatnick turtleneck and a beret. Maybe little tiny chocolate John Lennon glasses.
Chocolate flag-burners are easy. I can just picture the little marzipan flames licking at the fondant cloth...
Yes, please do make this, PS! And the matzoh dessert sounds so good, IK!! All this talk of chocolate makes me want to do math! (jk, I'm referring to that study in England I wrote about on my blog)
My dessert of godlessness is chocolate mousse. I want some.
Chocolate mousse IS ungodly... ungodly DEEEELICIOUS!!! :D Good one, Joy!
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