I'm so mad I'm gonna blog about it!

Greetings XXXXXXXX,

I talked with your father yesterday.

He has given permission to organize a healing.

The target date he and I have agreed on is the 22nd. A master number. This should give each of us enough time to prepare and organize our thoughts.

Here is Wikipedia definition of a stroke "A stroke is the rapidly developing loss of brain function(s) due to a disturbance in the blood supply to the brain. This can be due to ischemia (lack of blood supply) caused by thrombosis or embolism or due to a hemorrhage. As a result, the affected area of the brain is unable to function, leading to inability to move one or more limbs on one side of the body, inability to understand or formulate speech or inability to see one side of the visual field. "

We need to reestablish the flow of blood to the affected areas of the brain and also repair the damage that has been done. John's stroke is the result of a hemorrhage, resulting in bleeding in the brain.

Do we need to wait to the 22nd? No. I would just like to make sure we are all working together at that time for the greatest effect.

I would encourage the participation of everyone possible.

Take care,
XXXX

Right, so THAT was an email that greeted me in my inbox this morning, written by one of my father's well-meaning idiot friends.

THIS is what I grew up with. THIS is the big solution to all life's problems from the woo-woo crowd-- "Let's think really hard about it to make it better!" THIS is what they feel the need to INFLICT upon me now that my father is facing some serious end-of-life issues. (He is not living with me or with my brother, btw-- he's still in a hospital in another state, and he will have to be moved to a facility with round-the-clock care when he is discharged. There is NO good solution at this point. All our options are bad.)

I deleted the email, but then I fished it out of my trash JUST so I could shout my reply into the blogosphere:

Dear XXXX,

Let me ask you this-- if a "Healing" actually worked, why does ANYONE ever die? Doesn't EVERYONE wish really hard for their loved ones to recover? Why, specifically, would my father, who seems to have a cultlike following in you and your fellow well-meaning idiots, be experiencing all these issues? You think he hasn't EXTENSIVELY studied and practiced your Newage "healing" crap modalities for, oh, NEARLY SIXTY YEARS??? You think L. Ron Hubbard and Aleister Crowley are still alive? How about any of the ancient Egyptians and Chinese mystics you lifted your rituals from? Oh, wait, I forgot-- life expectancy was only about 40 years in those days and modern medicine has already DOUBLED it. Got news for you-- my father's sick because he didn't manage his diabetes for 30 years and his body is giving out as a result. It's simple biology. In further news, death comes for us all, with or without the cruel and false hope these lame-ass "Healings" bring the gullible.

Fucking spare me.

Please don't email me again,
That's Ms. XXXXXXXX to you.

EDIT: No, of course I didn't email the guy this! That would be rude.

Life is fragile

I am really sorry for the blog slowdown. It has been extremely hectic here. Worse than hectic, actually-- my father has had several acute health episodes in the past two weeks that have made it impossible for him to live by himself anymore. I remember these kind of events happening with my great uncle, and it leads me to suspect we don't have a whole lot of time left with my father.

My father is a very flawed individual. It was he who led me to skepticism-- through the roundabout path of my experiencing the Woo end of the pool firsthand and deciding to climb out and dry off. But because of his health, I'm not going to blog about the woofulness of my family until further notice. This is not something I do lightly, because I think you all know how strongly I feel about the dangers of falling for pseudoscience, etc. But I cannot risk writing anything that he might accidentally come across in his condition. For all his flaws, I know he loves me. There doesn't need to be any kind of heartbreaking confrontation over beliefs to darken whatever time we have left together.

I'm not going to shut down the blog or anything, though you can all see that one of my stress responses is to avoid reaching out on the web, lol. I will be writing about other things, though. Autism woo will continue to be attacked, as will anything else that makes The Perky Skeptic's coffee cup steam. Until I get rolling again, though, I hope you'll all take a moment to hug a family member. Life is too damn short.

Special shout-out to PalMD at White Coat Underground, whose post shook me loose from my lost-in-thoughtness enough to verbalize some of this. It's a great read.

Valentine Party Update

I'm doing that thing where I avoid stuff again. Argh. This time it's due to sleep deprivation. Bleh. Perky, grumpy Skeptic not getting enough sleep!

ANYWAY! :) On to UN-avoiding some stuff-- like BLOG UPDATES!!!

February was a big month in the Perky Household. LOTS of kid activities and parental stress! But it's all done, and it all went well!!! So, I am emotionally recovering from the rollercoaster, LOL!

The first Big Worrisome Event was The VALENTINE'S DAY PARTY at my son's class! I was asked to do an approximately fifteen-minute crafts project with the kids-- not so easy, because they range in functionality from full-blown inability to participate to Asperger, and the crafts portion of the party was at 3:00 in the afternoon (which is exactly the time when anyone with a touch of autism starts to feel REALLY WONKY), and at 2:30 the kids had gotten loaded up with chocolates, frosted sugar cookies with sprinkles, fruit punch, lollipops, candy hearts and CUPCAKES AS FAR AS THE EYE COULD SEEeeeeeeeeeee! --I'd like everyone to take a moment to picture the scene. Yeeeeesssss. :)

So, I had decided, thanks to some suggestions from Cyberlizard and other friends, to deploy paper doily hearts and rubber stamps! In preparation, I cut and glued a backing of heart-shaped blue construction paper to each doily. Then for enhanced tactile-ness, I bought some red sheets of that sticky-backed craft foam that you can cut in shapes and stick, and I cut large red hearts out of it. My final prep was to buy stamp-pads pre-inked with WASHABLE ink. ;) So, all the kids had to do was peel the paper off the big red hearts and stick them onto the construction-paper-backed heart-shaped doilies, and then we would rubber-stamp happy valentine decorations onto the big red heart! I made a Sample Valentine to show the kids what the finished effect would be, and to assure myself that this entire project wasn't ill-thought-out and impossible. ;)

After the VALENTINE CAKE AND CANDY ORGY, Mr. H announced me to the class (they all know me, but this is the first time I had ever done a project with them). The class was anything BUT ready to give me their undivided attention. They were all really happy, but EB had wandered over to the bookshelf and was rocking. P was at the table, but she had zoned out. T was at the table but inattentive. My own Wonderful Son was bouncing in place and flapping. ET had sat down at the table but was on the verge of fighting with S over a foam-rubber letter B. So the first thing I did was gently extricate the B and say, "I've got something you can each hold in your hands!" and gave them each a foam-rubber heart. ET was less than enthralled, but it sufficed. Then I handed out the backed doilies-- more interest! Pulling the backing off the hearts to stick them onto the doilies was practically a project in itself, and it was tackled with gusto by all. But when I unveiled the rubber stamps, that's when they REALLY got interested!!!

THINGS TO TOUCH!!! THINGS WITH LETTERS! AND NUMBERS!! AND WORDS!!! AND PICTURES!!!!! One of the more generally unresponsive kids actually came over to the front of the table and began methodically stamping every square inch of his red heart, as happy as a clam! My son saw the letters and IMMEDIATELY asked, "May I have a D-A-D?" :) :) :) Everyone seemed to enjoy it; even P seemed to enjoy watching. EB was content to rock, and I had no problem letting him. S got super-hyper when he learned the stamps would put pictures on human skin. Yes, thank goodness for washable ink! S asked everyone if they wanted a stamp, and he gave out many stamp-tattoos. This was soon insufficient, and S became a STAMP-NINJA, stealing every opportunity to stamp his classmates! T (who is the biggest eight-year-old I have EVER SEEN) did not appreciate this, and gave S a shove. S was undeterred, so we had to separate them when T whirled S around and stamped "HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY!" on the back of his shirt. (I admit, I could not help but chuckle.)

Then the rubber aspect of the rubber stamps was noted, and T started flinging the stamps around the room to watch them bounce-- which they did... really well. It was kind of fascinating, really. Wonderful Son went back to flapping while bouncing in place, and ET got cantankerous and kept trying to take stuff other kids were using. But by this time, everyone had made their valentine, and it was time to go home! WHEE!!! Perfect timing on all counts, really. ;) The kids even helped me pick up all the stamps and put them back in the box, and would you believe, EVERY single letter made it back home!

It was a great time, and fun was had by all-- which is, after all, the point!